Winter Blues

Yesterday we had a blizzard.. and I had a fever. I slept most of the day. Today my temp is 99.
a good thing.. as I was a bit worried when it was reaching towards 104. Here's the thing, a week off to finally catch up with stuff around here, like finally finish painting the hallway and a curve ball comes... no, not today says the Universe.
I'm feeling much better thankfully and gearing myself up to do something, even if it's something small.
I'm not fond of winter or blizzards and having to dig my car out. Gratefully, I don't have to go anywhere. I am tempted to take the camera out for a walk though. That won't happen as the practical side of me says that is NOT a good idea today, so we take pictures from inside.
The snow has stopped, not so much the wind... which was pretty scary last night.
Where we live now is a side street, so the attention to the clearing of roads is not as great as the main street we used to live on. I'm noticing most have snow blowers here and I am hoping to borrow a shovel. I could stay in until the weekend when the temps are supposed to go to 50 and melt it all.... I could stay in and just do art :-)

Holding Love

My friend Chaska on facebook had asked a question about what made us smile. My reply was that anytime a child from art class gave me a hug because they loved to do art with me... and yesterday was another one of those days. Little 3 yr. old Ian got up from his chair making his claim that he LOVED art! and there's the smile... my heart danced!
There's that validation again... this greater gift of giving something that makes a difference.
Bringing a love of creating to a child.. My hands, his hands working together to create whatever our imaginations can conjure up. It's such a wonderful experience that fills me with love and I can share that love with another - a child who really appreciated it and let me know :-)
So, yes Chaska, another day with another smile.. never fails me.
Holding this love gratefully in my heart.

Dance of Love

Chose some Christmas colors to get me a mood for the holidays. I love the idea of giving, but feel we have it all wrong in that department. It's the giving of the self that is what this season is about and not all the crazy stuff we run out to buy.
It is a wonderful feeling to received a token of affection from someone showing their appreciation, but to be honest, a thank you.. a sincere thank you is just as good and one of those thank yous that come out of the blue... when you least expect it.. feels even better.
I just have a really hard time with the whole commercial aspect of the holiday and the craziness of shopping and being on the road.
I want to stay in during the weekends just so I don't have to deal with finding a parking space. Instead, I'm loving staying in and fixing up our new place and doing some art and spending time with my hubby, warm and cozy.
I'd rather stay in the Dance of Love... the real message of the season.. to love one another, to move towards a greater peace.
If you are going to "gift" someone, why not make something, or give them some of your time.. but, if a gift is in order, buy in your own community, supporting the beauty of real personal service from a small business owner.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SXh7JR9oKVE
and if you have to be at the mall, I hope this happens to you.. click the above link for joy in the making.
May you be blessed with the abundance of love and dance in it joyfulness.
Namaste'
Doreen

Layers

Finally coming back to mandala more consistently thanks to my husband. I had started out doing mandalas every morning until the middle of October. Life went into hyper speed, kitchen got torn down and rebuilt. I painted in the art room and continued opening boxes and putting stuff away... and then I got sick.
My husband attributed it to not stopping, running myself down and not eating right.. so I stopped... even my mandalas.
The thing is, this mandala making is what I really needed to do to slow down, take some time for my self. I knew it, but didn't do it.
Then I noticed each morning, my markers and mandala book were laid out on the table ... waiting. I noticed, but there was too much to do... later.
Next morning and for a few mornings after that, he consistently set up my supplies.
He is so supportive, I thought and let him know that I appreciated what he did and then I sat.
I sat a made mandalas. I sat for a few minutes... caught some free time in between "obligations".. and began sitting longer and longer.
I paid attention to what came up... layers of feelings, peeling away like an onion... layer upon layer.
Let go of resistance, stop pushing the river, let my impatience fall to the side.. it all gets done in due time... little by little, step by step... layer upon layer it all unfolds, it all gets unpacked, gets painted, put away.
Forgive myself.
Forgive others.
I drove by the most beautiful sight. A tree caught in the sunlight, looking like it was ablaze and it took my breath away. Darn, I don't have my camera... I'll go back.
There are times I just want it all.. I want to embrace the whole of it, bite off way more than I can chew.
I went back.
Most of the leaves fell and although the beauty lingered, the moment was gone. I came across this quote today and it spoke volumes to me

"At some point in life the world's beauty becomes enough. You don't need to photograph, paint or even remember it. It is enough."
-Toni Morrison
I sit with this today, taking it to other levels.. sometimes one has to say, "enough".. stop. rest.
unpeel layers to find the core of what truly matters.
Love.
gratitude.
Thank you to my wonderful supportive husband :-)

the last pages

To really appreciate Lila's work, click to get a close up. These beautiful watercolors are stiched upon and then layers of fabric added.. Lila, I love the bird.. I am a bird LOVER!

This last page in the journal makes me laugh. Gemma's happy elephant with her full trunk.. You KNOW me Gemma :-) I always have a full trunk... and I love that purse charm! This one cheers me to no end..... love it. Thank you. Travel well....

and now to work on the cover.

and more pages :-)

Karen's Collages remind me of how much I want to begin doing soul collage. I've been saying this for a really long time. So much can be said with a few images.. simple, strong statements. I have enjoyed Karen's collages as they came by me.. thanks Karen
And Carmen! Carmen who initiated the whole process. I have been following her blog (she has a new one) for quite a while now. She is one to go to when you need a lift! Her positive look on life is contageous. I always feel good after leaving her blog. Thanks Carmen for inviting me to join you in this journey and happy to have you as a friend! Thank you.. Thank you

more pages in the journal

This is the other page facing Susie's first page - hey Susie, I am all about flying :-)
Flying by the seat of my pants mostly... and butterfly for transformation! Thanks so much for these two pages!

I love this "kiss" from Ily, a very talented artist. I enjoyed watching her figures and faces pass through my hands as the books came by. She is an inspiration! This also brought me back to my Berjan School days working with toddlers. We had one boy who was Spanish and I learned the word besos, meaning kiss... fond memory :-) Thanks so much Ily!

2nd and 3rd pages Art Saves Journal

This page is from Serena. I was fortunate enough to have Serena work in two different books. I love the way her page complements Shari's page and her important message for me and for all of us. We all have that inner beauty that needs to be released into the world.. without that, it wouldn't matter how great your make-up is. Our true beauty does in fact shine through us - a divine light- when we feel safe and secure, when we embrace love and gratitude for all that Life has given us. Thanks Serena.
Susie's playful page with a great Frankenthaler quote, "Every canvas is a journey all it's own"
How true... how true. Anyone that paints know this.. a journey that will take you down roads you never expected to be there. Stuff shows up and you ponder the message and meaning.
Thank you Susie.
Susie did another page - I'll post it next.

Page one - Art Saves

Shari's page... Practice random acts of art is something I like to practice... I even have a stamp with that message on it. Love the doll that goes in and out of the pocket.. thanks Shari for sending me joy in the mail :-)

Home again.. home again..

This is the canvas journal RR with a theme of ART SAVES
Carmen started us off with canvas journals that she stitched together. Each month (or so) we each created in each others book. I put my journal into a box and had sign in tags for everyone to decorate as they wished:
Carmen who started this project collaged the LOVE tag but had to show the back of it because it's so pretty (just above the peace tag)

Gemma's Peace Tag... very cool -stitched together
Amazing Ily with the face.. loved seeing her faces and figures.. she chose the Live tag but again, had to show the other side
Serena chose the hope tag - on the bottom it reads, "that lovely feathered thing"
Lila chose happiness but her tag above shows a watercolor flower.
Shari's was blessings: "count your blessings one by one." I may have to leave this one out to remind me
another good reminder.. Believe "in yourself" which Susie chose.. a most important message!
Karen, who always mailed to me :-) chose Faith
and I did Inspire
thanks for adding your blog addresses and thanks for all the wonderful art you blessed me with.
I have gained some new friends :-)
I'll be back with the pages later... in the meantime, go visit these wonderful artists!

Shari's journal

I woke this morning feeling such a deep feeling of gratefullness, filled with joy! I've been feeling that a lot lately. I'm just so joy-filled with being here in this new place. I spent the day yesterday painting in the art room.. the ceiling and "sky light" and found myself painting a book case 10 pm last night.

This book is Shari's from the ART SAVES Round Robin and is the last one. It was just what I needed to stay connected to my art while we were in this chaotic process of moving. I still am working out of boxes, but I know it will all get done in time... or will it :-)

I know myself enough to realize that stuff hardly ever gets "done" as one thing has a sense of order something else will need it and there is that constant search for "perfection" in things that keep it all moving.... after all - once things are complete, finished, we've moved on from this plane to another.. and then in a sense ... it's STILL not done. Who knows what work will have to do on the "other side" :-)

Hopefully it will entail something very creative.

Happy Day All

Still here...

Birthday Mandala

It's been a while since I've posted. My time has been filled with work and trying to put our new place in order. I've been missing the blogging. There's just been so much going on that it's hard to make the time and when I do have the time, I am way too tired...
I'm behind. This mandala is the front of a card for my friend who's birthday was in September!! Yeah. waaaaay behind!
The art room is moving forward in small steps. I was on such a roll and then life shifted gears into high and I had to leave it be for a while. Yesterday I painted some more and of course ran out of paint AGAIN! I'm having my issues with Benjamin Moore lately...not covering and the cost of the paint. YIKES!
Anyway... it's coming along and I guess one good thing is as I take my time with it, other ideas move in :-) I've decide to paint in a sky light (due to lack of paint color) to emulate the ones in the bedroom.
Today I have a bit of a breather, but laundry has piled up on me and I have to finish up a project for a friend... after that - The ART ROOM! I'm so itching to get in there and work on it--- so I can work IN it!
I've been doing my mandalas on a pretty regular schedule, but haven't scanned them.. and then I hope to blog more consistently.
One of the round robin journals is finished and I sent out my last book... waiting for mine to return to me and then I'll post that.
Life is full.. Life is good..
Kitchen cabinets arrive today and will be put in on Monday.. a new kitchen!
WE LOVE OUR NEW LANDLADY!!!!!

Leaving...

Jake made this painting table for me. It's strong and solid and I hated that I left it behind, but the new art room would not accomodate it. I had to be ok with it.. a little sad, but it's time to move forward.
Time to begin again. Start fresh with new ideas, new creations... a whole new world of possibilites!
I left behind 33 years of life in one place! Lots of good memories there, but as space got smaller and smaller, filled with so much stuff, it got to be impossible to work in this room. A room that became storage for art supplies rather than a working art room.. a place to create in.
Much got packed, but much also got released... given away.. thrown away.
I surprised myself.
I am one who usually holds on.. holds on tight.. too tightly.
Suffocating.
With releasing, I felt a sense of letting go. A part of me that I no longer needed. Who was that person? why did she need to hold on?
I think or maybe feel the reason that helped me through this process was death.
If I died today, who would deal with all this stuff?!? and would I want to lay that on anyone???
NO.
I emptied drawers and closets and boxes of stuff that hadn't been looked at in a very long time.
I came across art work from collage and even high school.. all now deteriorating.. and no longer feeling so important. I left behind the past. I moved on.
I don't need the physical stuff for me to remember. I just remember... the important stuff anyway...
I just didn't know.
Now I do.
NOW I know the JOY!
I know the joy of starting fresh... a new beginning.
Another chance.

Be filled with ....

Sun Light Beauty

Love

Sacred Layers

What is on the surface, this top layer of your life that is exposed, open for all to see? Are there obvious wounds, physical imperfections for all to see? Maybe not.
Maybe the wounds are just below the surface, just beneath the skin or maybe hidden beneath layers of clothing.. and then maybe the layer goes even deeper and not one person would even guess there is a wound, some scar left from the past.
How deep are these layers?
But even more important is how deep do we need to go to find the source of the wound... because it is there. The source for even the most obvious is buried deep within us... layers and layers.. and we dig and dig to get at it.
We unearth several layers, sacred layers of our existence to search for the truth - the source of our hurt. The real source.
The fear issue I was looking at today was defined to me as "abandonment". I didn't see it that way on a conscious level.. I just looked at my fear of someone dying as a deep loss. A little later on (during a quick meditation) I saw a moment of my past.. a source of this fear perhaps. Fear of something being taken away, fear of loss. An inner voice - that little "enlightened" moment.. aah, the holding on. I do hold on. Sometimes way too tightly.
I imagine releasing things, letting go, giving away.. and having compassion for myself for being this way. That is the dark side of grasping, holding.. so I bring it to light, bring it to the surface so light can shine on it. If it comes to the light, it can be delt with.. not so if it's buried in the deepest shades and I cannot see it.
A quote shared with me today:
"One does not become enlightened by imagining figures of light, it is by making the darkness conscious." Jung

Mandala for Annie 10x10

This is one page... I'm going to do another :-)

10x10 journal for Monique

In honor of the full moon in aquarius, this was the second page in Moniques journal.

I really love working on black paper. This mandala was for this very hot steamy day... and now it's ready to move on to Serena..

Be

After another full week of being in the world, I finally got some time, and a book in the mail, to be with my self to create. To be creative is a most wonderful thing. I've been sneaking in some mandalas here and there, usually while I'm waiting....
I wasn't sure what I was going to do, but I managed to put some gesso and a base coat of gold on a page the other day when I received the book.. waiting patiently for the weekend.
I thought I might collage or even use some fabric, but the marker came out and I drew and then painted. It's what I really needed to do.
This is Lila's journal in our Art Saves.. Round Robin
And now to finish up a violin.

Frisbee mandalas

At camp the boys designed their frisbees after a little inspiration of some mandalas I made. It was fun to watch them create and of course, some got into it more than others. I had hoped there were some extras, but nope.. next year, I'll order more.
Beware flying mandalas...

Peace and Quiet

We took a few days to go upstate for some relaxation. This was a real do nothing get away. Sitting on the porch watching clouds go by. Listening to the sounds of nature. Watching and observing birds, rabbits... feeling the breeze. It was perfect weather. Very condusive to bringing me into bliss-state.
I did a little mandala art... a LOT of reading... a little shopping in Woodstock.. and eating the most delicious corn and salmon.. Thanks Jake :-)

Taking some walks by the "creek" to listen to the water, watching some tubers and these ducks. They were so cute and very fast.. especially when the tubers came!

This rabbit hung around almost every day. We shared space together, quietly.

Going into nature to spend some time is one of the most healing things we could have done. John was definitely more revitalized by it. A deep appreciation for this gift of time.. time to share with my son and his girlfriend... for John and me to share together without distractions - or not too many anyway...

peace and quiet.. what we need to give to ourselves more often.

No tv. No phone.

Away from doing.

Just being.

quiet.

Art Saves... Ily's journal

This is my page in Ily's canvas journal.
It took a while to get to but I finally had a day "off" from most obligations, work, appointments... and was determined to get some art done.
Our theme of "Art Saves.." has had me mostly focused on how it saves me, but with this I have been more focused on how it has saved us.. We who inhabit this amazing and beautiful planet.
We humans have always created some form of art and so that tells me Art is here for a reason. We need it in our lives. From the earliest cave drawings to our modern digital art and all of it in between... art has saved us.
It helps us to deal with all the external stuff that surrounds us.. all the chaos.. all painful experiences. But it also helps us with grasping the beauty that surrounds us, trying the capture and hold on to it.. Assimilate it into our being.
Art is not just for artists but it is for everyone. How can we not live with art in our lives?
Unimaginable.
So, this page, for Ily, is my message of art spreading out to the four corners of the earth, radiating with love for all of us.. for all of the earth.
May art in all it's magic always be a part of your life.
Namaste'

10x10 RR for Valeria

I added a rhinestone in the middle... didn't delete the bottom picture though...
Val sent a really nice watercolor book and some watercolors as well... but... I used my twinkling H2O's instead. I haven't used them in a while and just love them. What won't show up is the glimmer that have. I added a bit of gel pen too for some added sparkle and I'm also thinking that white spot in the middle may need a tiny rhinestone. I took out the pan pastels for the edges and on top of the writing. For you Valeria, hope you enjoy it. It is a window for you. Open it up and let all the beauty of the world flow in to you.
And may love always be there no matter what direction you travel.
Namaste'
Doreen

Carmen's book

I spent some time last night working in Carmen's book, finally getting to finish it. I find it kind of funny how I waited for her book because I had these intentions of what I was going to do...but you know how that goes! With all that was going on, my idea went south on me, so I decided to start with a mandala and work from there and just allow it to unfold. Isn't that the best way to approach art anyway :-)
Of course the sparkle won't show as well here.. but enjoy it my friend. Carmen is my inspiration in following my dreams and this work was a message for me to keep doing just that!

10x10 For Ily

Of course I made this in Ily's book and it is for her, but it is also for me. The hardest part of doing these books is making a decision on what to do, what materials to use. I've been in a collage mode lately, so I went with it. No matter what medium, there is always a message revealed to me later on. Someone else may get something else out of it, but I found certain things amusing - what my subconscious had to say...
After painting the background and spraying it with a bit of glittery spray which no doubt will not show here.. and then I ripped images, just stuff, randomly, but what I found interesting as well.
As I began layering and fitting things together, I tried to make it flow. I moved and rearranged things quite a few times until I found or it found its place.
Then the messages appeared.
The cycle of life, the different stages of existence. I found a paper mache' tree and put the paper bag "house" there on top. We owe our lives to trees. Our breath and so much more...
I guess it's mostly about transforming. We change. From our youthful days where time didn't matter to aging and holding on to our appearances. Painting our hair, surrounding ourselves in beauty. Everything changes.. new growth and then eventually death.
How do we remain calm, serene and how do we maintain the state of wonder, observing the miraculous life all around us.. Amazing beauty, amazing world we live in.. and then chaos strikes. Let's not forget that mind-boggeling chaos that surrounds us and we work so hard at figuring it all out. We lose our balance for awhile... and then, we come back home to ourselves. We see a bigger picture. We move through the fears and grow a deeper faith. There is a light, a divine light that enters us... touches us and it brings us back to the wonder and the miraculous life once again.
Trust. It is my message to trust the Universe.
It all flows together. We all feed off one another. We are touched by serendipitous moments... messages that call to us. Yes. You are on the path. You are ok. Trust.

Flow with it - don't resist. Play while you are here for it is a short journey.
Create.
Love.
Enjoy it all.
Namaste'

10x10 in Shay's book

I couldn't scan this as it cut off the edge, so I took a picture and not a very good one... oh well. Hopefully it's in Coby's hands at this point. Waiting for the next book.... I was torn on this and what I felt like doing, so I doodled around the edge and then just HAD to do a flower mandala.. Fireblossom :-) If it were still in my hands, I'd probably keep filling in the space. click on it for a closer look....

Art Saves RR - Gemma's book

A mandala for Gemma. Not totally sure I'm done with this, but I'm also trying not to clutter it up too much... I used metallic and pearl paint and added a bit of glitter glaze to the outside part, so I am sure this picture won't give the full impact of that. A clear heart gem for the center.
I focused on the heart chakra for this.. heart and hand. I almost used the daVinci quote: "Where the spirit does not work with the hand, there is no art". Instead I spoke from my own heart :-)
Hope you enjoy this Gemma... and now to work on your tag.

The Reception

When the work is up and it's time to celebrate, this too becomes a favorite moment. I get to share with parents the joy of "playing" with their children.

They are so proud of their work. This municipal building holds two floors of their art and the kids get so excited going from floor to floor, finding their art and photos.

A budding romance???

I wonder who gets more joy... me or the kids...

Children's art show

These are a few of the boards that will be part of the children's art show this month. This is part of week of the young child. I hold art classes for preschoolers, and while working with them, I take photos of them.. because it's really all about the process. Along with the art and photos are quotes. If you click on the picture, you might be able to read them. These are only 4 of 32.. plus sculptures in a case. I so enjoy working with these children, capturing their moments of creative expression... one of the highlights of my work.

I give them black circles and shapes and let them explore... some are so typical of the mandala stage of their drawings.

Playing with clay is one of my favorites.. and beading. Such concentration in their faces. And the pure joy of discovering new things.

and then there is this printing project. I give them soft blocks in various shapes and let them "build" on paper. Of course being a messy project, this usually turns out the be one of the projects that produce the best pictures of colorful hands. Those I will save for the next post :-)

Today is our reception... looking forward to seeing these cutie-pies and their excitment. Kind of cool having your art exhibited at 3 years old!

10x10 Round Robin Journal

This is another, yes, a different round robin that I also joined. It has gotten me into the back room.. the art room that needs a major cleaning up! These get mailed out Monday for Coby to create in... "Have fun Coby" and then will move on to 8 more creative souls. I'll be posting here on this blog as books come through. It will be hard to do just one page, but will refrain myself. Sometimes it is just so hard to stop.

The problem lies in what to do.. which medium to choose. I started out painting, but also wanted to collage... but the pen, the zentangle/mandalas help to get me centered. They quiet my mind from the worlds distractions.

Thanks Ileana for inviting me to play. I needed it.

For Karen

In our RR canvas journals "Art Saves", I have received Karen's book. She did a page with a Klimt images and I love Klimt. It was immediately inspired when I saw her page and I knew I would use gold. My original idea though was something different.
Instead, it turned into the "klimt-style" tree. Unfortunately, metallic paint and glittery accents don't show up so nicely so you'll get to see it much better when it reaches your hands. (those participating, anyway)
I took a walk yesterday and it was so nice to see crocuses.. white, purple and tiny buds on the trees. I was thinking about how much I appreciate Spring after a challenging Winter.. You who live in paradise type environments where the weather is mild most of the year... I wonder if you take it for granted. Do you lose the magic of these small buds.. these tiny miracles of life!
I am in awe all over again. GREEEEEN!!!!! COLOR!!! LIFE!!
It's actually happening. Today I welcome Spring with wide open arms today at 1:32 pm.

A use for a box

This box held some yummy chocolate crunchy cookies given to me by a yoga student... best was the box! It has a magnetic clasp to hold it shut and it was a perfect size to hold the canvas book. It also contains a bag of "goodies" that you, the participants can draw from for whatever your heart desires to use it for.... and the sign in tag. It's not attached. I used a coffee filter for the pocket to hold colorful cards with various words on them. Pick one and sign in and play :-)
I put the box into a bag... one of those padded things from the PO, but "you" do what ever you need to do to send it, but I do want the box to stay nice... Maybe I'll paint it when it returns home.

Looking forward to the next journal................